Session 4


Ran an Infiltrate the besieged city and assasinate the invading queen! session yesterday. Two players had never tried RPG's before, and they were incredible. See that horrible, inescapable maze of death traps up there? They totally aced it. They found and dismantled the invisible knives, then furled them up and carried them around in their backpacks. I am constantly amazed at how total newcomers can rise above the ashes to piss on the dungeon's flayed corpse.


After infiltrating the city and letting their army in, they went to the Palace Massive to assassinate the Frost Giant Queen of the elves. The Cleric cast Command Word: "Obey" on this elf and his burrowing worm mount, and they became fast friends of the party for 1d6 days. The party named them Sebastian and Flounder.


The girlfriend of one of my new players joined in half-way through, and we pushed a surviving 0-level Pygmy Musician up to level one for her. She hitched a ride in her boyfriend's backpack. He'd sacrificed all his possessions to Vorn anyway, so it was easy.

She was eventually captured by elves and separated from the party, to be taken to:


From this critical position, her and the other Thief of the party crept out to survey the queen: a 16 foot tall frost giant with four arms, covered in tattoos, playing a game of Elven Chess against a massive iron machine. With careful inspection they discovered that the chess game emulated the battle happening in the streets below. The Pygmy went to summon the Fight King, the thief started wrecking the bits inside the machine, and the Cleric burst in the door shouting Command Word: "Lose!"

Unfortunately, Frost Giants have a will of +11, so she just looked over and killed him in one turn. Then she bit the thief's head off. The Fight King burst in on a flying frost serpent to battle her, and while he fought the party Warrior burrowed around the foundations of the tower with Sebastian. The tower collapsed, but the frost queen jumped away to the next tower.

I look around the table. "Ok, does anyone have any reason why you wouldn't all be massacred?"


The clerics of Vorn around the city all chanted a prayer, and the twin hands of Vornheim - The Palace Massive and the Eminent Cathedral - twisted around to grab the frost queen between them, trapping her above the city forever.



One dead player rolled up Sebastian to play next session. The undead are invading, and they're planning to go back in time to try and stop all the terrible shit they caused before it began. It's going to be amazing, again.